Sunday, September 12, 2010
The Beatle’s sang it so well with their 1963 song, “Chains”
“Chains, my baby's got me locked up in chains
And they ain't the kind that you can see
Woe oh, these chains of love got a hold on me, yeah”
We’ve all experienced these chains in some way, shape, form or another at some time in our lives. They might be between two lovers, spouses, parent/child, siblings, boss/employee, friends and, well, just about anyone who will feed you an erroneous belief system that emotionally convinces you that you are anything less than Divine Love incarnated into the human form.
On an energy level, those chains are quite real in the form of energy cords which bind us to others in ways that emotionally feed us on some level. You might have been the one to create them; someone else might have sent one in your direction and you took it on board. In either case, they are real… and they will ultimately hold you back at some point in time from continuing on your spiral of illumination and well-being.
Why? Because they keep you from fully entering your heart space where you can find more Love than you ever hoped to receive, and be able to give, from the limitations of that energy cord.
Throughout this website, I talk about that beautiful connection we all have on a Divine Soul level and how our Divine Souls are all talking with each other, assisting each other fully and freely, to help us all wake up to the beauty of our individual heart songs. Once we do begin to get a glimmer of our heart song, our Divine Souls will then guide us to our courage to stand up and sing it.
This Divine Connection is not the same as the energy cord connections that we create on a subconscious human level in an effort to keep ‘a hold’ on another.
The fact of the matter is, we don’t even become aware of those chains until we have evolved enough to want to be free of the dynamics of the old relationship and move into a more heartfelt one.
There are two entries in the Open Your Mind section, Giving and Receiving is a Two Way Street as well as All Creation is in a Constant State of Change, where I talk about the attack-and-consume ‘gobbler’ dynamic where one endeavors to fill themselves full by looking outside their own hearts for their ‘drug of Light’. If you haven’t read them, they will give you more insight into why a cord is created in the first place. Physically, it is through own hearts, nowhere else, where we tap the infinite fountain of Divine Love. It cannot be tapped through our ego-intellects.
In the Evolution of Healthy Relationships entry in this section of the website, I talk about activating the vibration of Divine Light, which is Divine Love, to allow any relationship to evolve for the highest good of all involved. That technique will automatically dissolve the weaker cords.
Those stronger ‘gobbler’ cords, however, can stubbornly hold on like weeds in the garden when you don’t pull out the roots. They will hook themselves into specific areas of your body, and stay hooked, until you consciously make the choice to release them. Each energy cord created was born with a personal motivation in mind. Often, they are done in the name of ‘love’ and are done subconsciously.
To give you an example in my own life, my relationship with my father had an energy cord that locked into my body under my lower left shoulder blade. As I came of age, I went through the normal maturation process of endeavoring to release my self-identity from what I perceived was his disapproval of my life choices, as well as his vision of who I was as his daughter. Kids: they are a breed all their own, aren’t they/we? Needless to say, my life choices were very different from the ones he wanted me to make. At the same time, I was selling myself short in a vain attempt to fit myself into what I perceived were his expectations of me.
It was all pretty ‘textbook’ in its normalcy: Father wants what he sees as best for his daughter while daughter wants what she sees as best for herself. Yes, to give credit where credit is due, there were times where his ‘vision’ for me was much better than the one I held for myself. There were also a lot of times where his ‘vision’ was way off the mark for what was truly right for me. Welcome to planet earth and parent/child relationships. Any relationships for that matter.
As I ‘came into my own’ and learned through trial and error to make my own life choices, my intellectual desire for his approval lessened. Still, when we met face to face, there was always that faint emotional whisper from the ‘daughter’ in me that hung on to wanting his approval of the adult I was becoming.
Paradoxically, the more I intellectually released him, the stronger the density under my shoulder blade became, making the muscle tighter than ever. Of course, I never really made the connection between the two until much later.
For years, I went to massage therapists to loosen up the muscle density there, but the relief was always temporary and slight. I went to Reiki masters who were able to loosen it up – one actually made it go away all together - but it always came back. I did Reiki on myself and that, too, worked for a while before coming back. My body even went out of alignment because of that density so I tried yoga, which realigned my spine, but didn’t get rid of the density under my shoulder blade. In emotionally trying times in which I intellectually second-guessed myself, it became downright painful.
Why? The energy cord between us was still connected. He didn’t want to release his emotional tie to me in his effort of being a ‘good father’ nor did I want to release mine to him. Any time I found myself looking for approval from someone in my growth process, that original cord got activated from its intellectually dormant state. There’s no ‘fault’ in this; there is only cause and effect. That’s just how these cords function.
Finally, one day, I was guided from within by my Divine Soul and ‘woke up to’ the presence of that ‘gobbler’ energy cord running between us. It was in meditation that I cut the cord and let it transform into pure white Light. Within a very short period of time, the density in my body was transformed. I no longer feel it to this day. The old behavioral habit patterns connected to it followed with their own transformations into new patterns. My Father has since finished his time here on earth, but I am happy to say I managed to ‘wake up to it’ before he made his transition so I got to enjoy a brief time with a different kind of relationship with him.
That’s a pretty tame example of the every day variety. I have worked with others whose ‘gobbler’ cords are the stuff that feature films are made of as they project out and run between all sorts of relationship combinations.
How do you know if you have a ‘gobbler’ energy cord tangling you up – where you’re trying to subconsciously feed off of another person and/or they are subconsciously trying to feed off of you and you are letting them?
And, how can you recognize if someone is sending out a ‘gobbler’ energy cord in your direction?
Here are some basic signals:
• You want to ‘fix’ them
• They want to ‘fix’ you
• They want you to ‘fix’ them
• They want to ‘save’ you
• You want ‘saving’
• You want them to want you to ‘save’ them
• They want you to want them to ‘save’ you (you see the loop here?)
• You want them to ‘want’ you
• You emotionally want their approval and hold yourself back until you get it or get hurt if you don’t
• You let them hurt you and you hold on to that hurt
• You want to hurt them… or hurt them back
• You refuse to forgive them or refuse to receive their forgiveness
• You look to them to ‘pick up the pieces’ of your drama
• (fill in your own recognition of a relationship or dynamic that is holding you back from living in your heart – chances are, there is a ‘gobbler’ cord in there somewhere)
• The list can go on and on… basically, any dynamic that keeps you from standing tall and singing your heart song at the top of your lungs, no matter how off key it might sound to those around you
Each ‘gobbler’ energy cord you have up and running with another person will most likely lock into a different part of your body. There might be more than one running between you and the other person.
The value of cutting the ‘gobbler’ energy cord is that you both can evolve into a deeper relationship and engage on more ‘real’ heart levels. This is true whether they are still living on this earth or have made their transition to other dimensions. No, you don’t need the other person’s ‘permission’ to cut the cord since it is your health you are treating and it is for the highest good of all involved. Sure, they might try to send out another one to you, but you have the free choice to accept it on board again or not.
So, let me share a technique that will cut those chains that bind you.
I have tried this technique with hundreds of others. It is deceptively simple and it works… to the direct degree that you want it to work and allow it to work. Remember, Divine Light is unconditional and will do whatever it is you ask It to do, in direct proportion to your intention of allowing it. That’s our free choice in action.
1. Start with the Basic Activation of the Divine Light Vibration. This is most important because you will have anchored your conscious awareness in a transformative heart vibration, rather than an intellectual one. If you are not already in the habit of doing this meditation, I have it on the website in a recorded format or in a written format if you would like to record it in your own voice and let yourself be guided by your own voice.
2. Hold the person with whom you want to cut the energy cord in your mind’s eye. Surround them with the Divine Light that flows from your heart and which you consciously activated in the Basic Activation of the Divine Light Vibration meditation.
3. Ask yourself, “Where is the energy cord connected to me?” Go with your first instinct. Your Divine Soul will be guiding you in this; there might be more than one cord between you and the other person. The cord might be connecting more than just two people.
4. Say, “I want to see where it connects into __the name of the other person__”
5. If you don’t see it, no worries; keep going. Your loving intention alone is enough for this next step: see yourself cutting the cord somewhere half way.
6. Declare, “I release this to the Divine Light Vibration of Divine Love for transformation into illumination.” (Or use your own words for Divine Light and Divine Love; again, it is the intention that counts).
7. See in your mind’s eye the cord dissolving into Divine Light.
8. Allow it to dissolve all the way to where it connected to each of you… and then even to the roots of it where the cord was anchored inside your bodies. If you didn’t see the cord hooking in the other person, again no worries. Work on your own body and the alchemy of transformation will also be working simultaneously in the other person’s body on the mirror side of the cord.
9. Important: fill the empty space up with Divine Light where the cord was once anchored. Think of it as cleaning out the root system. If you don’t clear out the root system, it will try to grow back.
10. Rest in that process until you feel a sense of lightness and expansion. You might feel a little strange in the newness.
11.Finish the process by acknowledging, “Only Divine Love and Light is here, only Divine Love and Light can come between us. I am filled with Divine Light. I am Divine Love.” Take the time to feel each one of those thoughts move through you before you go on to the next one.
12.Ask your Divine Soul, “Is this finished?” If you get a ‘yes’, then smile, you just did some really good work! If you get a ‘no’, ask “What comes next?” and follow the inner guidance. (If you are new to hearing the ‘yes’ from your Divine Soul, take a moment to read how you can hear the ‘yes’ of your Divine Soul in Divine Soul Conversations)
As a small reminder, if either you or the other person try to reconnect the ‘gobbler’ energy cord, you’ll recognize it if you start to slide into the old dynamic. Simply stop yourself and send them Light from your heart to theirs. Remind yourself in your own words (and them if you feel called to do so) that you no longer choose to play in that sandbox.
Oh, and don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t completely dissolve all in one sitting. Sometimes, those weeds can be pretty stubborn in the garden of your psyche. It also might be that you weren’t fully ready to let go, only partially ready. That is fine, too. Each flower has its own growing season.
Photo: Hilo, HI